she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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