I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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