i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
