He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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