They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
