I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Randomize