At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize