I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
