did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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