so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
