I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
