Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
