Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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