I cockslap morals
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Randomize
