he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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