i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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