A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize