Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Randomize
