rhymes with "ouble enetration"
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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