hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Say something about gay babies.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize