How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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