He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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