absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
