Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
