Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
she pinky promised me she was 18
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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