Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
We're using joints as your birthday candles
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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