i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
