Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
