We got so high we made milksteak
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
