There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
