I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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