I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
