I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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