WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
