He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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