so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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