A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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