I just saw a hot homeless man
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
My penis needs a shock collar
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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