More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
that's an acceptable place to lick
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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