Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
What drink are we having for lunch?
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
