You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize