I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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