Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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