Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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