one word: firstdatebathroomanal
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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