and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
