whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Randomize
