it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Randomize
