so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
