Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
