They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
