Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
